My dear friend and co-worker Mia sent me the below video, knowing I would love it like a son.
My response to her was "I want some of whatever this guy is smoking." Of course, it would have been so much better if she had sent it to me at 4:20, but hey...
Anyway, the video is bizarre, surreal and somehow still hilarious while taking on one of the most infamous urban legends of all time.
I know that Mia and Uncle P will be calling each other "Charlie" for many weeks to come, while our co-workers look at us, scratching their heads and asking themselves "What the hell is up with those two, anyway?" And we'll laugh all that much more, knowing we have confounded them once again.
Meanwhile, we'll just chuckle at our inside joke and hope that no gay stoner unicorns insist we accompany them to Candy Mountain. My organs are NOT for sale, thank you!
I have no idea why people love Kubrick's version of The Shining. I suppose that as a movie, it's pretty good, if a little a silly. As an adaptation of the Stephen King novel by the same name, it is a total fail. And don't try to argue with me, because you won't win. As a massive King fan and someone who likes to put words together and hope they make sense, I have to side with the author of the source material, here. That book scared the hell out of me. The movie just made me sad.
Anyway, that exceptionally silly image of a frozen Jack Nicholson is there because that's how I feel right about now. I have absolutely had it with winter and want the flowers and the birds back, tout suite, maintenant! "Oh, but Prospero, the snow's so pretty when it's coming down..." Yeah, well so is the arterial spray of a half-naked co-ed being set upon by some madman or monster. Ooh! A little too dark for ya? Well, suck it up, hombre! (Hey - 3 languages in the same paragraph - that's pretty good).
You see? This is what winter does to me. It depresses me and makes me crazy and it makes me want to do bad things to stupid people... I'm at work on a new screenplay and -- my hand to God -- I've written a character based on a composite of my clients, just so I can kill him off in a particularly gruesome way. And I'm having no problems at all imagining increasingly horrible fates for most of the main characters. Truth be told, I really don't see it ending well for any of them, though my characters have been known to surprise me with unexpected and unintended (at least originally) behavior in the past. Once, an intended antagonist ended up becoming the heroine, simply by reacting to her situation in a way I never intended her to. But just between you and me -- I wouldn't count on more than one survivor, if any at all, this time... See? Winter Madness. Cabin Fever. Whatever you want to call it. I wrote a one-act play and screenplay about it (and several other unpleasant topics) called The Cow Says: "Moo!" The screen version can be read here, should you be interested. But be warned, it's grim, to say the least. And don't even tell me you're surprised...
Okay, I know. It's the weather. You can't do a thing about it except sit by and watch it happen (or in this last storm's case, sleep through most of it). And I know - the weather is one of the many reasons to wtach and support your local news programs. Uncle Prospero watches the NBC affiliate WCAU in Philadelphia, with Glen "Hurricane" Schwartz, a pleasant and slightly eccentric fellow who is deadly serious about the weather. He's usually pretty calm and matter of fact, even when being emphatic. Here's Glen, who is quite the Philly-area celebrity, at a local Scarecrow contest last fall:
Peddler's Village is about 40 minutes north of me; a place filled with quaint and unique shops and restaurants, near New Hope, southeastern PA's version of P'Town.
When a big storm is coming, the weather guys get excited, because it means more camera time. I get it. But it seems sometimes they just want to scare the crap out of you. Take this clip from AccuWeather.com weatherman Jim Kosek, last Friday:
I have a co-worker who holds a degree in meteorology and desperately wants to work as a broadcast meteorologist. I shared that clip with him via Facebook and his response was: "Oh, my God! What a wacko!" Though I certainly understand Mr. Kosek's despair (I feel your pain, bruthah!), that segment was just a little... oh, I don't know... unprofessional and way over-the-top? Yeah, that's it.
I almost used a different image tonight, but this one made me laugh because the sign itself is a funny fail, made funnier by bad spelling. It's like the He-Man Woman Hater's Club grew up and founded a nudist colony, despite Miss Crabtree's best efforts to teach them how to spell.
Those links and references were aimed solely at my sister and so dearest friend, Q -- and yes, I have a friend who designs gadgets for MI6 -- and they have little to do with tonight's topic, except that the sign made me think of one of my favorite lines from "Will and Grace." Will asks Jack some really obvious question and Jack's response is: "Does a gay bear have anonymous sex in the woods?" Ta-da! Talk about a segue (no, not this).
So, tonight's first really gay thing is this almost unbelievable clip from a 1992 Danish film called (I'm not making this up) Gayn*****s From Outer Space. The space-zombies over at i09 linked this item from a blog called Filmdrunk. And while I would like to think that the filmmakers were trying to make a comedy that pays homage to '70's Blaxploitation, I fear they were merely paying homage and forgot the comedy part... I am stunned that such a movie exits and had to share the horror with you. It gets reallygay around 3:35 (may be NSFW):
And I know I've been talking a lot about Lady Gaga, lately. I broke down and bought "The Fame Monster" and I'm loving it. I have to admit, the Lady is hardly a tramp. While some might dismiss her as just a freak, hers is some of the best dance music I've heard since the 90's, and her lyrics can be quite clever. After being seduced by "Teeth" (the video I posted last month has been removed - sorry), I checked out more and really liked what I heard, so I bought the CD. I love her video for "Bad Romance" and a few days ago discovered how good a song "Speechless" is. And tonight, coming home from a very, very long day of lunacy, idiocy and probable mental incapacity at the day job, I discovered how much I liked her duet with Beyonce on somewhat silly "Telephone." They sound great together and the song just makes me want to move.
Well, synchronicity met up with serendipity tonight, because I logged onto the interwebs when I finally got home and discovered a fan-made video (via) for that very song, which very well may be the gayest video karaoke ever. I know that the two real ladies in question will be gracious enough to allow this loving tribute to go viral - it's funny, sassy and oh-so-gay, as well as a dead-on parody of Gaga's other videos. Enjoy, bitches:
I'm off to commit more atrocities to paper... Act I of the new screenplay is almost finished. The real fun starts after about three more pages. Let's see how depraved I can get. Oh -- and another snow-bound Zombie Zone post tomorrow -- and you know what happened the last time. Be afraid... be very afraid...
Oh, crap! Now I've gone and raised your expectations and I'll have to be really on tomorrow night. Of course, being snow-bound will also mean plenty of time for Act II... Okay, you can be afraid again...
I have not been a fan of most popular music for a very long time. Most of it is unoriginal, boring and downright crap. In fact, I've heard better lyrics in cereal jingles than the Black Eyed Peas' "I Got a Feeling." And some songs are unavoidable, though their inherent catchiness is soon outweighed by their over-exposure. And I never would have heard Chris Brown's not terrible song "Forever," if it wasn't for this infamous viral. While there are plenty of recording artists putting out all sorts of crap, as always, there are the rare few who are actually good.
And then there there is Lady Gaga. That's her in a Dominatrix Minnie outfit on your right. Now I know I've heard and could recognize at least one of her songs: "Poker Face" Not exactly a terrible song and certainly harmless enough. But I'm afraid that I know who Lady Gaga is more for her outrageousness than for her actual talent as a musician (which from all accounts is considerable). And to be fair, she is a fierce supporter of LGBT rights and proclaims herself a champion of outsiders and freaks everywhere. So, what does any of that have to do with the Gayest Thing You'll See This Week? Well, I'll tell you.
If you're a regular reader, you know Uncle Prospero loves him some homemade gay boy video karaoke (and shame on you if you mind leapt straight to porn before reading the word "karoake."). It all started with that damned Beyonce song and when I find great examples of it, I have to share. Here then (via) is homemade gay boy video karaoke of Lady Gaga's "Monster," The Gayest Thing You'll See This Week:
Ten years ago (is it really 10 years?) a little no-budget horror film took the US by storm. The Blair Witch Project starred complete (and still) unknown actors, working from a mostly improvised script, relying on hand-held cameras and a director who who basically terrorized his cast for several days in the Maryland woods.
The production company, Haxan, knew they had something extraordinary on their hands. But how to market it? Some genius at Haxan (many have taken credit), decided to use the burgeoning Internet to take their film to the public, and the very first Viral Advertising Campaign was born.
Blair Witch had been a midnight fave at Sundance, but it was the Internet that really set it aflame. Some people (okay, a lot of people) thought it was real. The supposed 'found footage' of three documentarians who had disappeared while making a movie about a local Maryland legend went on to be the most successful independent feature film, ever.
I saw it first with a group of friends in rural New Jersey, and had to drive home through a mostly wooded region, afterwards. And I will be the first to admit that that ride home was extremely nerve-wracking. I remember thinking about a third of the way through the movie, "Enough! Leave them alone!" As an avid camper, the movie hit a nerve and I completely identified with the perils faced by the young protagonists. The best trailer I could find has Dutch or Swedish subtitles, but you get the idea:
The movie itself induced either terror or nausea, depending on one's sensibilities. In my case, I was scared silly. I saw it again with my then boyfriend, Rik, who I thought was going to pull my arm off (and yes, his name was really Rik) in fear. Needless to say, we cuddled a bit closer that night.
Like the best horror films (The Haunting) we never actually see anything in The Blair Witch Project. We hear lots of creepy stuff and we see glimpses of what may or may not horrific images, but there are no CGI ghosts or demons; no gore or splattered brains; no psychopaths waiting behind closed doors. And in those final moments, we see poor Mike standing in a basement corner while a terrified Heather screams, just before her camera falls to the ground. We never learn what exactly happened to our trio of filmmakers. We only know that they are missing. Creepy, scary stuff, indeed.
1st person POV to the extreme, Blair Witch changed the face of film, in more ways than one, forever. And a whole bunch of movies owe it a debt of gratitude. Last year's giant monster in New York movie, Cloverfiled, owes a huge debt of gratitude to Blair Witch, as does this year's phenomenon, Paranormal Activity, both in style and marketing. If it weren't for the Internet, neither film would have been nearly as successful.
Much was expected from both the cast and crew of Blair Witch. Little has come from it, for any of them. But recently, I came across this trailer for the newest film from Blair's co-director, Eduardo Sanchez. Seventh Moon looks like it could be an interesting and effective fright flick, though like Sanchez's last project, the surprisingly good alien horror film Altered, Seventh Moon looks like it will be released direct-to-video. Here's the trailer:
I guess the point is, no matter how good your movie is, and no matter how great your marketing campaign, in Hollywood you are only as good as your last hit. And that's a shame.
I can honestly say that I really hate most of today's pop music. I don't know if that means I'm getting old, or that popular music has degenerated into pure crap. I'd like to think it's the latter, because most for most of my life, I have rarely been a fan of most pop music.
And while I know who most of today's pop artists are, I have rarely heard any of their stuff. I never play the radio... DJ's are mostly morons and most of what they play amounts to what I consider "musical pablum;" easy to swallow, but low in intellectual nutrition. Does that make me a snob? Maybe. But I honestly don't care. No, I'm not against a great guitar riff or a terrifically danceable beat. Like so-called "popcorn movies," a truly great pop song can excite and energize. Though I usually prefer music that makes you think (hence my current adoration of Grizzly Bear), a great pop song can make me dance, sing and shout with the best of them. Unfortunately, these days, great pop songs seem few and far-between.
Like many recording artists today, I know of Shakira, but couldn't name one of her songs of you held a gun to my head. But after this, I will always know she recorded "She Wolf." Ladies and germs, I give you "He Wolf," undeniably the gayest thing you'll see this week (via - among others):
I owe you an apology in advance. I wasn't going to post tonight - I've been trying to catch up on other things, and then there is the show I'm in. But then, I came across this:
Good Lord! Is this what the Internet has brought us to? I expect the Information Age will in the future be known as the Too Much Information Age. I didn't need to see this exceptionally fat man's titties (nor did you, for that matter), but there they are; on display for the whole world to see and judge. Apparently, Chuck Barris was ahead of his time. The Internet is the new Gong Show, with any manner of whackadoo displaying his or her talents online for the whole world to see and judge. And judge we will. Because the rest of us are perfect Tens who never do anything embarrassing or distasteful in public.
But at least we don't put it online for everyone who has an ISP to see. Yeesh!
Don't ask me what Mitt Romney has to do with it (other than Mormon homophobia, I suppose), I just thought it an amusing image -- but that has nothing to do with this post, which is about celebrating all things gay. And by all things, I mean silly gay boys doing silly things on camera and posting them on YouTube.
For me, the trend really started with Shane Mercado and his racy bedroom version of Beyonce's Single Ladies., which I talked about in my very first "Gayest Thing" post, way back when. It's a great song that I never tire of hearing or of seeing new versions and parodies.
Next, was this fellow's bath towel-clad version of Kelly Clarkson's I Do Not Hook Up. Classic and very funny, especially as he continually needs to adjust the towel.
Then, a few weeks ago, (via) I saw this fan-made vid for Miley Cyrus' "Party in the FIP," by several scantily-clad silly gay boys on Fire Island:
I guess they're sort of cute. They sure look like they were having fun. the song itself is sort bland, though. Everything one might expect from Billy Ray's girl (and as you know, Billy Ray sported the most magnificent mullet in all of redneck history).
Then a friend sent me a video by a group of silly gay boys in Asbury Park, NJ (which is quickly becoming the Fire Island/Provincetown/New Hope of New Jersey. Here is the gay version of Ms Hot Mess Whitney Huston's Million Dollar Bill:
Okay. There were some cute silly gay boys in that video, too. And s lightly better song. I hate most of today's pop music, so what do I know? Further proof of my looming obsolescence, I suppose.
Then today, (also via) comes news of group from South Central L.A., gayin' up the slums. Here is Spice Boys 5 performing Stop:
Oh, dear. Grim and not adorable at all. What's wrong with the silly gay boys in da hood? Still, pretty gay, eh?
And to end on a not-so-gay note, a movie I have waited nearly two years to see is finally being released on DVD; dircetor Michael Dougherty's horror anthology Trick 'r Treat. Those have seen it, rave about it (and I hate them). Anyway, Yahoo Movies has the newest trailer here. I can't wait!
Wow! Two music posts in a row. that's a record for me (you should excuse the pun).
This is Danyl Johnson. He is the latest "overnight sensation" to come out of the UK. On "The X-Factor" - sort of a cross between "Idol" and "(Insert Country Name Here)'s Got Talent." As the last auditioner on what had been an apparently fruitless day, Danyl's version "With a Little Help from My Friends" actually brought Simon Cowellto his feet.
Embedding has been removed, but you can watch Danyl's audition here. I will admit, he is a terrific singer with loads of stage presence. And it doesn't hurt that the 27 year-old teacher is also very pretty. But, during a Google search for more info about him, I came across this article in the Daily Mirror. Apparently, beautiful Danyl doesn't limit himself to one sex or another when choosing his partners, which means his fan-base automatically increases by at least 10%.
Honestly, as much as I loved watching Susan Boyle shock the "Britain's Got Talent" judges with her amazing rendition of "I Dreamed a Dream," I'd rather watch a hot teacher singing Beatles' tunes than a frumpy Scotswoman singing show tunes. Who wouldn't?
Finally, this almost got its own post, but I've already posted a "Gayest Thing" this week. I suppose I could have called it "The Gayest Video Game You'll See This Week," but that would be a bit redundant, especially after you see the clip. Ladies and germs, (via) I give you "Ultimate Muscle Roller Legend" (possibly NSFW):
I just love how the rider gets "extra power" from his "cycle." Redonculous, as the kids say.
I must admit that despite being "wired in," I am not actually current on most popular music. Yes, I know the names and the styles (usually), but am not always familiar with the actual music, itself.
Now you have to understand, my rather extensive CD collection is comprised of mostly film scores and soundtracks, followed closely by Original Cast Recordings, Cirque duSolielscores and other odd bits of epehemeralweirdness. Of course, my collection contains many standards and must-haves (everything from Beethoven and Mozart to Pink Floyd and The Beatles and almost anyone in between - with the exception of most CW and almost all Rap). I have CDs by The Who; Elton John; Olivia Newton John; Madonna; Frankie Goes to Hollywood; The B52's; Devo; LoreenaMcKennitt; Cyndi Lauper; Annie Lennox; James Brown; Tom Jones; Dead Can Dance; Pet Shop Boys; NIN; Peter Gabriel; October Project... the list goes on and on.
Sadly, I find few modern pop artists interesting in the least. But lately I've been reading lots and lots about Brooklyn-based, openly gay band Grizzly Bear. I hadn't heard any of their music until I stumbled upon the below link (via). It's fan-made video (by a str8 fan) for the song "Two Weeks" and is just a gorgeous, surreal, Steampunk-Papercraft-Puppet-Animation gay love story. And the song ain't too shabby. Excuse me while I peruse the Grizzly Bear catalogue and please enjoy the video while I do so:
OK. Entertainment out of the way, it's on to politics. Also via, comes the following clip of National Organization for Marriage (NOM) spokesperson Nancy Gallagher being ripped to pieces by CNN's Lou Dobbs and University of Pennsylvania Law Professor Tobias Wolf. I love how, like everyone else who opposes same-sex marriage, Gallagher cannot come up with suitable answer as to how same-sex marriage affects and/or attacks hetero-marriage. Watch the bitch squirm here:
Ahh... I bet you forget all about the political activist in me, didn't you?
It's been a while since I posted anything about LGBT rights and Marriage Equality, but that doesn't mean I haven't been thinking about them.
Rise Up & Shout is Marriage Equality organization dedicated to promoting LGBT rights among modern LGBT youth. They sponsor an annual production aimed at showcasing the talents of LGBT youth, in the hope of raising awareness and countering the hate-mongering Right.
As always, I continue to urge you to write; email; Tweet; Facebook Message and IM your local, State and Federal representatives. Let them know that LGBT rights are simply basic Human Rights and remind them that we do not seek special treatment, only equal treatment, as provided by the U.S. Constitution.
"... all men are created equal" should never be taken as less than a universal truth. In a country founded on the principles of equality, we should never even have this debate in the first place. Rise up and shout - it's the only way to be heard.
Below is the trailer for the new Playing for Change documentary, Peace through Music. I ask that you go the site and share this on your blogs, your Facebook and MySpace and Twitter pages, and in emails to everyone you know. As the world grows more and more connected, we must learn to connect with one another on a more personal basis. The only way to understand and accept our differences is by first embracing our commonalities. Music and art are a part of every culture. As I've said before, the melodies, tempos and instruments may be different, but the notes are all the same. Enjoy:
